sing anyway

Some days there won’t be a song in your heart. Sing anyway. ~Emory Austin

I’ve been writing a lot, not posting, not blogging… just writing. Scribbling down thoughts, bits of poems, stories of my past, wishes for a future…nothing very relevant or earth shattering, just snippets of a life. I’m trying to find myself again, to fix what is wrong and become me again. Writing is something I’ve done all of my life when I’m troubled. I make lists, and lists of lists. My mum taught me to do this. My fears and worries don’t seem so scary if they are in black and white. And I can always tear them up and feel a bit better knowing that they are gone (well, not really gone but somehow it calms me). So, writing… it’s helping and allowing me to peek out of my hiding place to post this.

Misguided, wrong, inaccurate, erroneous… the definition of a mistake, is this what I have become? Words and thoughts seem to consume me. Keeping me up at night, making me question how I could have seen this coming? Worrying and wondering why and how and what I can change. I should have known, I should have paid more attention, I should have listened. I took things for granted and now I’ve no idea what to do. I thought all would be well, I could handle this, but I can’t. And I can’t talk about it, for if I do, it somehow makes it worse. So I write and pretend everything is fine, life goes on… sing anyway.

 

I think I’ll do just that… sing anyway.

 

I’VE MADE A MISTAKE

Closing the door
On the cares of the day
A failure they said
I should have known

I’ve made a mistake

Turn off the lights
Praying for sleep
Not sure what to do
These thoughts won’t keep

I’ve made a mistake

A flutter of panic
A spasm of pain
What is it I wonder?
I’ll just stay awake

I’ve made a mistake

I can’t say a word
I won’t make a fuss
I’ll hide in my mind
As dreams turn to dust

I’ve made a mistake

I wish I could tell you
I wish I could speak
These words only hurt
As I admit my defeat

I’ve made a mistake

I think it’s the end
I suppose it’s too late
It’s just like the first time
But now I just wait

I’ve made a mistake

It happens, they tell me
Once in a while
So I’ll wait in silence
And remember to smile

I’ve made a mistake

I’ve made a mistake
There’s nothing to do
I’ve made a mistake
And I can’t tell you…

I’ve made a mistake

let your heart sing

 

I’ll leave you now with one of the songs I’ve been listening to lately. I’m learning to let go of the past, to live my dream, face my fears and hope for a miracle. Music helps… sing anyway! The song is by William Fitzsimmons ~ Fade And Then Return from his album Gold In The Shadow… something to think about. I hope it makes you sing!

<a href=”https://itunes.apple.com/us/artist/william-fitzsimmons/id213326316?uo=4&at=1l3vpX9″ target=”itunes_store” style=”display:inline-block;overflow:hidden;background:url(https://linkmaker.itunes.apple.com/htmlResources/assets/en_us//images/web/linkmaker/badge_itunes-lrg.png) no-repeat;width:110px;height:40px;@media only screen{background-image:url(https://linkmaker.itunes.apple.com/htmlResources/assets/en_us//images/web/linkmaker/badge_itunes-lrg.svg);}”></a>

Thank you for reading, next blog will be more positive… sunshine and lollipops (I promise)!

 

It started with a song… and ended with a smile.

~annie

For more info on William Fitzsimmons and his music, please follow the links below:

William Fitzsimmons/

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